NEW YORK, NEW YORK — We recently sat down with that coworker who always has a better way to do everything.  Not by choice, he just popped up out of nowhere.


“So what you’re going to want to do is…” he went on, and to be honest we stopped listening. “And if you put your finger there, and hold it like this, you’ll get more…”


We mentally dozed off, and drifted away to that billowy cloud mental space where we can’t hear or see anything. We thought about the pasta sitting in our fridge at home, about whether our my roommate might eat it. I bet that fucker is going to just take a little bit and think I won’t notice. Whatever, it’s 2020, we’re all struggling. Enjoy it, Tina. 


“I’ve been doing it this way for a couple of years and it has really helped my…,” oh my god, he’s still talking.


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