WINSTON-SALEM, NORTH CAROLINA — We are getting live reports of a local server, Gus Ferguson, desperately waving his arms around and screaming to get table 43’s attention. Their gaze seems to be permanently fixed on their phones.


“HI HELLO CAN I GET YOU STARTED WITH SOME DRINKS?!” he screamed, standing on top of the table, holding his server pad. “IS ANYONE LISTENING?”


Last word from the scene was that he was saying the words “Beetlejuice” over and over, trying to figure out if he has died on the way to work.


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