UNITED STATES, USA — We caught up with a group local bartenders at a coffee shop this afternoon as they were meeting to trade notes and forecast what would be the next big resurrection in cocktails. When we arrived, their table was littered with early 2010’s issues of Imbibe and printouts of old Difford’s Guide articles. They were in hot debate.
“You’re wrong! The small-tin-inside-large-tin strain is taking it too far! No way. If this is what you want, I’m leaving,” shouted one to another.
“Fine, but if you’re proposing bringing back pretending to enjoy militant classics like Aviations or a Hanky Panky, it’s way too soon. We’re not done with this 90s ‘whatever dude’ mentality yet! I mean, we’re just now getting back around to serving Strawberry Fucking Daiqs!” responded another. A third member of the council began to raise his hand to make a point and was cut off unceremoniously, “Can it, David. The only thing you brought to the table was creme de fucking noyaux and canned pineapple.”
After 5 minutes of back and forth, it became apparent that the group was not going to notice our 6 person crew standing next to their table. So we took the opportunity to pack up and leave. We wish them the best of luck in their search that will likely end in some other bullshit we’ll report on later.